Sunday, April 16, 2017

Happy Easter

Once again it’s time to celebrate another spring with family and friends. After everyone gets back from church, the party begins. There’s plenty of food and drink to go around, and the kids are hopped up on a jellybean high.

Unfortunately the holiday abruptly ends as everyone has to be at work in the morning. I know that many of us workers get Good Friday off, but come on… I need a break after the holiday. In this day and age, what we really need is a Good Monday to follow Easter!

If you liked this video, please hit the like button below, and if you haven’t already, please click the subscribe button, and as always, thanks for watching.

I think I’ve been watching too many YouTube videos on mBlip. 😉

Pax,

-f2x

Sunday, April 9, 2017


Death

So I came home from work earlier this week, and my neighbor was waving at me from her kitchen window. I walked over to see what she wanted. Her husband, Stan, died in his sleep on Tuesday. He was in his late 60’s.

Stan was a pretty good neighbor. He would shovel the snow off my walk while I was at work, helped me clean my gutters, took care of my house while I was in the Army, and we’d have conversations on his back patio whenever we finished doing our yard work on Sundays. We borrowed each other’s tools, and helped each other with various chores. I could really talk to him, and even our political discussions were never argumentative or judgemental. He had a way of helping me find clarity amidst the confusion.

I’m about to reach parity when it comes to the living versus the dead ratio in my life. It seems like the older I get, the more dead people I know, and while it’s true that dead people never seem to make mistakes or have any flaws, they always seem to leave me with that heart-wrenching lump in my chest and throat whenever it occurs to me that I can no longer indulge in their company… And what I wouldn’t give for a hug from my mom right now.

Yesterday I turned another year older… Another year closer to death. I miss so many people right now.

Pax,

-f2x

Sunday, April 2, 2017

I didn’t get the job.

Well, the title basically says it all. After two evaluations and two interviews, they politely turned me down. Personally, I think they were doing me a favor. My current employer lets me listen to headphones, drink tea, and vape while I work. That wouldn’t have been possible with this new job.

On the bright side, I’m still working at same place I’ve been working for the past 19 years and 5 months. Every day is a new personal record for the longest I’ve ever worked for any employer. To celebrate I got a new set of wireless headphones.

Pax,

-f2x

Sunday, March 19, 2017

Route Planning

So if I had the time to sit down and explain everything that’s going on, then it probably wouldn’t be going on, because I obviously had the time to sit down and tell you about it.

Usually I have Sunday’s off, but even today I’ve been way too busy. I did manage to change the car’s serpentine belt that I ordered from Amazon two months ago, got an oil change, and I took the dog for a ride out to my new employer’s facility.

Oh, don’t get me wrong… I haven’t actually got the job yet, but I really want this job, and so far all the tests and evaluations have gone very well. Be that as it may, I’m literally on the wrong side of town to get to this place, so if I’m going to drive this every day, finding the best route is a bit of an imperative.

So I’m taking a half day at work tomorrow. Grace has to go in to the vet to have another growth removed. After a fine needle aspirate, the vet said it looks like it may only be a lump of fat cells, but given her history and the location of the growth, a lumpectomy is prudent.

So Grace is having surgery tomorrow, and I’m trying to get a new job with an employer that’s difficult to get to from here while maintaining my current job that continues to increase my workload while the company cuts everyone’s benefits and pay… But I’m sure our CEO will name his new boat after the company to show his esprit de corps.

Pax,

-f2x

Sunday, March 12, 2017

Promising Career Change

I’m not old, but I’m not as young as I look either. I’m not going to tell you exactly how old I am, but I’ve been working for my current employer for 19 years, 4 months, and 10 days. When I started there, there were over 130 people working on three shifts. That number grew a little for a couple of years, and then that number started falling. Today we have about 31 people left working in the factory, and most of them are much older than I am with between 30 to 47 years of service. Several are considering retiring within 5 to 7 years.

The company is facing a retirement bubble. When those old-timers leave, there probably won’t be a company left. There have been a number of warning signs over the years. Less than two years ago they made everyone take a 5% pay cut because things were so bad. I’m making less money today than I was 5 years ago.

But 19 years is nothing to sneeze at! I’ve got a real history with these people. They are like family to me, but the writing on the wall is pretty clear. The CEO is not going to fix the long term staffing problem, and if I’m willing to stay there till they shut the doors, it’s unlikely that he will have any sympathy for my resulting joblessness.

So I set out to find a new employer…

…and I found one.

I’m going through their vetting process right now, and things are looking very good. It takes a few weeks to get through the process. When I get the job, I’ll be making more money and have plenty of opportunities for advancement. I’m really looking forward to showing them what I can do.

Of course I’m a little scared. Changing jobs can be risky, but no risk, no reward, and at this point I think the greater risk is staying at a company I’m not entirely confident will make it through the next decade.

Wish me luck!

Pax,

f2x

Sunday, March 5, 2017

Cord Cutting Conundrums

Although I’ve dabbled with cable a few times in my adult life, I’m what you might call a cord cutter. In fact, I cut that cord long before the term cord cutter was even in vogue. In the early days, I used to use rabbit ears and a VCR. This was back when dial-up was still popular, so YouTube hadn’t even been invented yet.

As time passed by, different avenues of entertainment presented themselves. Oh, sure, I’ve used torrents here and there… Who hasn’t? If you don’t have a DVR, it’s a pretty reliable way of catching last nights episode of “The Big Bang Theory”. On the other hand, it’s not something that you can easily explain to family and coworkers, not to mention it’s somewhat frowned upon.

Netflix is currently my go-to for streaming TV and movies. I’m also an Amazon Prime member, so I’ve got some options there too. Toss in Pluto, Crackle, YouTube, and suddenly you’ve got a pretty decent lineup of shows at your fingertips.

But now my dad wants to cut the cord. The cost of cable and dish has gotten too expensive, and he’s looking for options. Naturally, I’m sharing my Amazon and Netflix with him (not against the rules BTW) and he’s even played around with Kodi. Apparently there’s even apps out there that let you stream live TV, so I got him an Android TV box.

Since he lives about 30 miles away, I also got a box so I could tryout different setups… Well, I tell ya, this little time vampire is not yet ready for Prime Time. It’s frustrating as hell. Lots of problems with apps freezing, or just being plain broken. Then there are the rather dubious “services” that want you to sign up. All in all, it just doesn’t lend to a very satisfying TV viewing experience.

But there’s something about this device that holds promise. Something about it makes me think that if I found the right combinations of apps, this little device could be the answer my dad is looking for.

Then again, it could just be another colossal waste of time.

Pax,

f2x

Sunday, February 26, 2017


How’s it goin’?

So it’s been another long week for me. Lots of O.T. and lots of stuff at home to take care of. For some reason, optimists cannot resist the opportunity to piss me off when I’m swamped like this. They say shit like, “Oh I bet you’ll really appreciate that paycheck!” or even, “Isn’t it wonderful to keep busy like that.” Just fuck off already.

I’m worn out and tired. Their optimistic take on my situation isn’t something I want to deal with at the moment. It would be nice if they would just give me a nod and say, “Yeah. Been there,” so that I know that they actually understand, then move onto some other topic.

The more I think about it, the more I think I need to work on flipping the subject onto them. Sort of a “Enough about me, tell me how your life is going,” kind of tactic. Something that’s iron clad and air tight so I can reflexively deploy the optimism deflector without them having a clue that I really don’t give a fuck.

Pax,

f2x

Sunday, February 19, 2017

The Time Warp Again

Part of getting older is the joy and wonder of physically falling apart. An increasingly common occurrence, I had a brain splitting headache this past week. It was one of those that necessitated the use of a sick day… or in this case two sick days.

When I get knocked out of commission like that, my state of mind is going to be altered. It’s bad enough when my head is exploding with pain, but coming out of that state is when the real mindfuck begins.

It was like my brain was a wet sponge being squeezed, and all the liquid memory started to percolate. Once the squeezing finally stopped, I still had to put the memories back in place and in the right order. Along the way I realized a lot more time had passed since my last introspective, and so many changes have occurred. The horrors I re-experienced were not just bad dreams; they were the realities I once lived through all over again.

And now it’s mostly over. I can finally go back to my routine. Only a touch of tension to remind me that I had not been well. I’m left with a mild sense of uneasiness that the world I live in is a very different place than it used to be…

But I can’t worry about that now. Too much work to catch up. Too many other things to worry about. Too little time.

Pax,

f2x

Sunday, February 12, 2017

Hobbies

So my hobby is running this website. Primarily I collect and share jokes. I also create and post a comic. Also you can’t forget about these little asides I keep writing. So quick recap: Collect jokes, make comic, rant, and post it all on this website. For some reason, this brings me a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment.

If you regularly read my Sunday rants (although I highly doubt it), you may have noticed my fixation with visitor numbers. It got me to thinking about things… Why do I care? If curating this site is only a personal hobby, and I don’t make a dime no matter how many visitors I get, then why do I care if anyone ever visits this site?

When you look at people’s hobbies, there’s usually some kind of reward. Let’s look at some examples:

People who exercise get healthier bodies which are more attractive, and therefore increases their social status. Higher social status can lead to additional successes in mate selection and even job advancement along with a higher income.

People who restore old cars get to enjoy seeing that rusty heap turn into a shiny museum piece on wheels that they can then sell to collectors for considerably more than they put into the vehicle.

People who collect things tend to buy and sell for profit. Although mathematically there have to be a substantial number of losers in this game, we tend to gloss over it.

People who learn to play musical instruments can perform in public for money… People who learn to paint can sell their artwork… Actually all artists can sell their stuff.

Even people who go hunting for a hobby justify it by claiming they consume the meat, and that the meat has a monetary value.

Try googling “hobbies that don’t make money” and you are going to get results about hobbies that make money.

My point is, you’d be hard pressed to find a hobby that didn’t have a prosperity potential behind it, and in our increasingly capitalistic minded society, earning something for creative endeavors is becoming the only reason for creating. Isn’t the joy of creating enough?

But that still doesn’t answer the question… If I don’t make any money from this, why do I care about how many people visit this site? To be honest, I wouldn’t actually feel better about running this site if I made money off of it; I’d feel worse because of the stress caused by the obligations that come with monetary transactions.

So why?

Let me know what you think in the comments below.

Pax,

-f2x

PS: You know I did try incorporating Google Adsense into this site once… Even after two years, it didn’t even manage to get halfway to the $100 threshold needed for Google to cut a check. Never again.

PPS: I think I may have found a hobby where the hobby itself couldn’t lead to making money: Birding (aka bird watching). You might be able to come up with a method of making money off of birders, but no one is going to pay you to watch birds. So unless you’re drawing or taking pictures, or writing books or papers about birds that you can sell, bird watching by itself seems to be financially pointless. Can you think of any other popular and socially acceptable hobbies where money can’t be made?

Sunday, February 5, 2017


It went from bad to worse.

It shouldn’t really matter. I mean, I really like running this site, no matter how many people visit on a regular basis… but the analytics were still off by a lot more than I expected.

It’s mainly attacks from server farms, China, Russia, Ukraine, and various other hackers who routinely visit the site in order to scan for security weaknesses. It made the site appear to have more visitors than it actually did. I added some new rules to the htaccess file in order to bail them overboard so I could see truer numbers. The results were a little disheartening.

First of all, I should mention what I did. I added a few simple lines to the .htaccess file that redirected any visitor who snoops around wp-login or wp-config to google.com. That was it. For some reason my stat counter considers these valid visits when they obviously aren’t. The htaccess redirect prevents them from ever actually reaching this site.

The good news is that after redirecting those obvious bots, the number of visitors is not zero. Real people actually come here, and some of you come here on a fairly regular basis. Thanks for that. It means a lot, and I appreciate your choosing Flush Twice.

The bad news is, the numbers are embarrassingly low, and if you take away the people who googled “Ginger Jokes”, it gets even lower still. The total number of visits from actual humans is currently under fifty per day. All things considered it’s really not that bad, as it always appears to be over thirty.

Back in its heyday, Flush Twice was getting over 500 uniques per day. That may sound like bullshit, but back then, there weren’t as many cool websites to visit, and I was able to plug this site in forums. Today, plugging a site on a forum can get you banned or doxed, so I’m not taking any chances. Also, people have a lot more choices and slicker marketing campaigns targeting them. Small, independent sites like Flush Twice get shoved to the side, and nearly forgotten.

You also have to take into consideration that many internet users hang out on Twitter, Facebook. Pintrest, YouTube, and other heavyweight sites. They don’t have any incentive to venture out from their walled gardens, and so they don’t. Strangely, even when a heavyweight site noticeably increases their agitation level, they still won’t leave it. (I know this because I had to kick my own unhealthy addiction to reddit.)

But you came here today, and for that I thank you.

Pax,

-f2x

PS: In case you noticed (which I doubt, but still…) I changed the category for these asides from “News” to “Sunday Rant”. It should be fairly obvious as to why: It’s not really news, I’m usually ranting, and except for about three posts, they’re always on a Sunday. So there you have it. If you were thinking, “Hey did it always say ‘Sunday Rant’?”, it’s not your mind playing tricks, I really did change it.